Ive been long gone didnt make anything submissions in some months,
didnt contacted anybody in some months on both furaffinity and Deviantart,
Been sick in my head for months while smiling on the outside like notthing is wrong.
But i was sick sick for years, destroying every bridge, every person that came helping me, every person that leaned a hand, paw
to keep me afloat i blindly reject, i blindly assume, i blindly drinked like a idiot spilling every drop, every second, every year
hoping to just restart this and search where i blindly choose the path that ive been walking for years now.
making decisions that i start lie-ing to people for making art or help out with a website while im getting lazyier and lazyier sicker and sicker in the head.
and every time i make one of those journals like this one i get all my hopes up but then just will get more sicker and will assume more like a wild spread cancer.
but this time i took my time longer to recover, months of preporations, looked where my weakness really layied.
be laughing more at +18 jokes, or loving art from people you know long ago and yesh im repairing every bridge that i still can salvage of my blindly actions.
some will be lost forever some will be renewed.
i know i have good intentions a good heart pumping inside me and a good ear to listen for those that may will cross the same path like me to help out.
i also know that im crazy, crazy in a good way, something thats me and just me al toghter in one package. it makes who i am from the past and today.
my art and website hobbyies will come on his own pace getting submitted on Furaffinity and Deviantart and while il be doing that.
i just need to work further on my own, repairing every broken part and every part thats heavyly damaged just well... just work arround or working toghter with.
its who i am today and sorry if you dont like me or hate me i wont break so easy this time !
have a wonderfull day or night and injoy while it still can! ^^
and sorry for this super long journal after so long!